Sometimes, you feel like there’s a light at the end of the tunnel.  That is how I feel today and I am thrilled!

I spent several hours in the Emergency Room on Sunday because of an infection with a high fever and uncontrollable chills.  The ER doctor told me to check in with my oncologist, Dr. Ben-Jacob on Monday for follow-up care.  In the meantime, it turned out that I had a previously scheduled check-up with my Primary Care Physician, Dr. Salisbury, on Monday also.  Perfect timing for the problems I needed to get figured out.

I hadn’t seen Dr. Salisbury since November, so we had a lot to discuss at my appointment.  He very patiently listened to all the details of my treatments and tests and ER visit, etc. and was able to figure out a way to help me.  My biggest problem over the past several weeks is that I’m still on liquid feedings through my nasal-gastric tube, which is very irritating.  And a big part of the problem is called “dumping” syndrome.  Because I haven’t been eating any solid food, every time I have a feeding, which involves having what is basically Similac for adults pumped into my intestines through my ng tube, I get sick.  About an hour into each feeding I start getting overheated and claustrophobic, then I have to hurry to the bathroom because of endless diarrhea, then I get nauseous and usually end up barfing.  It lasts between 30-60 minutes and is quite miserable.  I’ve taken anti-nausea medications, I’ve tried meditating and praying, I’ve listened to soothing music, I’ve read, I’ve played computer games, and on and on and on just to get through.  Eventually the feeding ends, and then the dumping starts again when I have another feeding.  It’s been quite discouraging.

Anyway, Dr. Salisbury suggested a couple of changes to the way we do my feedings, and it has made all the difference in the world! We are cutting back slightly on the amount of the formula I get and diluting it with water.  We’re pumping it into my ng tube over 12 hours instead of 10 hours.  This way of doing feedings is still new to us, but we are right now in the middle of the third time and I have not had ANY dumping syndrome, the diarrhea has slowed down, and I haven’t thrown up since Sunday afternoon.  This.is.huge!  My feedings go from 7 PM – 7 AM and I wake up feeling hydrated and well-rested and energetic.  It is amazing!

Now, let’s just make all this good news even a little bit better!  I have been able to swallow a few things other than water!  I’ve eaten an Otterpop each of the past 3 days, I drank a little bit of smoothie this morning, a little bit of hot chocolate last night, and a graham cracker soaked in milk today. And our friend Emily brought dinner tonight and I was able to eat a few beans, a few bites of delicious shredded taco meat, and a strawberry!  And besides that, I’ve managed to drink about 30 ounces of ice water!  I feel amazing!  I feel like a normal person!

It was warm and sunny here this morning, so I very carefully went down the front steps and sat on the rocking chairs with my friend Elsie and we ate popsicles.  It was wonderful!  Maybe my esophagus is finally healing!  At least for this moment, things are looking up and I could not be more grateful and happy!  Hooray!

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